Sales Meetings From Hell!

Written by Sean McPheat | Linkedin thumb

If you want to make sure that your next sales meeting and visit bombs quicker than Liverpool’s chances of winning the 2009 Champion’s League then make sure that you take the advice of Ivegotta Closeya, one of the most successful, unsuccessful sales people in the world.

Here’s his top 6 tips for making sure that your next sales meeting is well and truly a sales meeting from hell!

Ivegotta Closeya

1. Just Wing It!
Go into the meeting with no specific objectives in mind. Just play it be ear and have no specific outcome for what you want to achieve. That’s a real test of a salesperson! Fly by the seat of your pants!

2. Research Is For Whimps
Conducting clent research is a real pain in the 8ss! Just don’t bother. After all, sales is a numbers game isn’t it? If the next sucker doesn’t buy then some other sucker will…won’t they?

3. Decision Maker? Keh?
Assume the person you are going to meet is the decision maker. After all, they must be important to be meeting you right?

4. My Kit Has Never Let Me Down Before
No need to check your laptop cables, your laptop batteries or whether you’ve got a back up plan if the laptop packs up. What’s the use of that? Also, you’ll have plenty of business cards either in your brief case or in your jacket pocket so no need to waste time on them.

5. That’s Enough About Me, What Do You Think About Me?
Me, me, me, me, me! Love it! I’ve perfected my pitch and I’m gonna close this person and get them to buy it. I’m not going to waste time hearing about their pain and their issues as I know these already. So I’m gonna go for the kill. Wish me luck!

6. I Get Objections All The Time, I’m Great At Handling Them!
I was once told by my Sales Manager and some Bald Sales Jedi Guy to frontload my objections into my presentation but that’s a waste of time. I love it when objections surface at the end and then I have a ping pong match in overcoming them. Oh, yes, that’s the true test of a sales rep! 15 love!

And now a tip from “The Bald Sales Jedi Guy” – Ivegotta Closeya is a complete loser!

Make sure you reverse his logic and tips and be prepared for your next client sales meeting!

Happy Sales Meetings!


Sean McPheat

Sean McPheat
Managing Director
“Bald Sales Jedi Guy” – thank you Ivegotta!

MTD Sales Training

450 sales questions free report

Originally published: 9 April, 2009

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