Don’t Puke Over Me Please!

Written by Sean McPheat | Linkedin thumb

Businessman with thumbs downI’ve just got to tell you about two of the worst examples of selling that I have come across in a long time!

Poor Example # 1

“The Garden Centre Waffler”

My wife and I were looking around a garden centre when we were admiring a garden table and chairs for our patio. We have literally just walked up to and said to each “this is nice” when a sales person pounced! He then went on to talk about the features and benefits of the product for the next 5 minutes solid, I’m not joking here, 5 minutes of waffle! “It’s £1,495 and it’s got this and that, it’s made out of this wood and has a 5 year warranty”.

He went on and on and on and …..

At the end I said “Thanks for all of that but we have already got this table” (Sorry, me playing devils advocate. We hadn’t really) “You’ve just wasted 5 minutes when you could be selling to someone who needs it. Qualify me first and then ask questions”

All in all we must have spoke no less than 5% of the time and he never asked me one question. Not one!

Learn from that sales lesson and please do not just show up and throw up over me!


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Poor Example # 2

“The Business Development Manager Jinx!”

So there I am, interviewing for a BDM role.

“If they can’t sell me at an interview, they’ve got not chance out there in the real world!” I thinking to myself.

This is a funny story…

Jo (name changed to protect the innocent actually said this to me):

“Well, I started my employment in 1988 where I was Junior Sales Assistant with XYZ but they went bust in 1991 so I moved to ABC company and worked there as a Business Development Manager for 7 years until they had to call in the receivers. I moved across to Peugoet then in 1998 and worked there until 2004 before being made redundant and in the last two years I have held 2 sales positions”

My reply:

“So every company who you have worked for has gone bust right?”

Yeah, like I was going to employ that lady! There would be no more sales tips like these in 6 months time!

Honesty is one thing and I applaud her for that but “selling her skills” in that way was awful!


Happy selling and make sure you do not make the same mistakes that I mentioned above!


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Originally published: 12 March, 2008